Award and the Grossest Thing Ever
First things first. Angela, who just moved over to her own domain, gave me this triple award thing:
Get this, ya’ll: it’s for having a positive attitude. I wish my Mom knew about the blog, because I’d make her put this award on her fridge. Speaking as a girl who almost got sent to Catholic school in the seventh grade for her “attitude problem”, I’m super proud. I’m supposed to nominate ten people, but I’m going to do this instead: if you’re reading here, consider yourself awarded. Those other two parts of the triple award are best friends and sisterhood, and if you’ve stuck with me, you more than deserve an award. 
Okay, now for the grossest thing EVER.
I was watching tv last night when I saw a commercial for frosted shredded mini wheats. I HEART frosted shredded mini wheats. I am not exaggerating when I say I keep two boxes in the pantry so I always have a continuous supply of the little squares that make up half of my regular diet. But this commercial was so horrible, so deviant, so disgusting that I nearly tossed my cookies right there on the couch.
The commercial was for HOT frosted shredded mini wheats. As in MICROWAVED. That my friends is the most disgusting thing I have ever heard of in my entire life. First of all, if you’re going to serve me hot milk, there better be some cocoa in it. Secondly, if you want a hot breakfast, make some eggs or eat some fucking oatmeal. Do NOT microwave your frosted shredded mini wheats, for Chrissakes. I even like to let the milk (the delicious COLD milk) sit on the cereal for a minute to soak it up, so it’s not about the texture. It’s all about temperature. What kind of sick fuck wants hot frosted shredded mini wheats? I mean really. Do you microwave Chewy bars? NO. You eat them at room temperature. How about salad? Want a steaming hot garden salad? Fuck no you don’t, and you don’t want hot frosted shredded mini wheats either.
If you do want your frosted shredded mini wheats microwaved you are now dead to me.
10 comments
We love the blueberry and strawberry ones . . . somestimes even the maple – either with or without milk, but NEVER micro’d !
I’m a purist, I don’t like the flavored ones.
Yeah, it would definitely be a “cereal killer” to micro Frosted Mini Wheats. Bleah. I think it’s a good thing I haven’t eaten breakfast yet.
I know, right?
.-= MsDarkstar´s last blog ..Back to "normal" =-.
My dad is a big fan of Grape Nuts in the microwave. It’s basically scarred me for life.
I tried that once. Disgusting. Reminds me of another Grape Nuts story, need to search my archives to see if I already posted it. Would make a good TMI, if that’s not scary.
HAHAHAHAHA I know that commercial. I like shredded wheat, haven’t tried it micro’d. I kinda don’t like using a microwave anyway. BUT….at risk of my death….I would be willing to try it. *winces*
I didn’t say I LIKED it, just that I would try it someday. Maybe. Dunno. Haven’t bought any in forever cause no one else here likes it.
.-= Angela´s last blog ..One Of The Most Oddest Moments Of My Life! =-.
Oh, microwaved Chewy bars? That sounds quite yummy, actually…
.-= Beach Bum´s last blog ..On a diet =-.
“Hot” is straight up antithetical to “Frosted” even if what they’re talking about is sugar.
Also, I am adding “eat some fucking oatmeal” to my lexicon as a dismissal phrase.
.-= nicopolitan´s last blog ..Nicopolitan Guide To Modern American (part 1) =-.
I’d sooner microwave a cat.
.-= Mr. Apron´s last blog ..I’m One of Them =-.
I’m stealing the award and pretending you gave it to me.
Hot shredded wheat. Fucking gross. Next they are gonna tell us to heat corn flakes or fruit loops up….
.-= Stephanie´s last blog ..HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BEBE! =-.
You crack me up, but I am in full agreement!
.-= Lollygagger´s last blog ..let go. =-.
Dude, microwave the bowl after getting them all soaked in the milk. It turns it in to oatmeal. Made of wheat. The experience was life-changing.
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