The universe was given a gift on this day, not so long ago, wrapped in a pair of stunning blue eyes and the best impish grin that ever existed. A strong, intelligent woman with an uncanny ability to find beauty everywhere she looks. A wise soul with an infinite capacity for understanding the abstract as well as the concrete. Pure in heart and true in spirit, she seeks and often discovers the best in people.
By some measure of grace that I will gladly spend the rest of my life becoming worthy of, I am one of them. That’s the best way to describe her love and friendship; I want to become the person Wendy Lou thinks I can be. Despite her well-informed position on the matter.
Which started as an attempt to explain to her how incapable I was of being that person in this world. Instead, she convinced me to believe in myself at least as much as she believes in me. Every flaw, every fall from my cute and functional pedestal is greeted with that same empathetic wince and her forgiving arms, just like when I lose my balance on the kitchen step stool.
No small amount of wonder surrounds the impenetrable nature of our bond. Simply put, I no longer wonder who’s face I’ll search for in the crowd of my father’s funeral. I know where I will find that gentle expectant gaze. She is a spiritual sister- regardless of what our futures hold, that promise is every bit as sacred and unspoken as it is with my biological sister. In the sense that my sister understands innately where I’ve been, Wendy understands innately where I need to go. That the two of them enjoy a friendship of their own is among my greatest joys.
One of my greatest sorrows is her occasional failure to look at herself the way she sees everyone and everything else. She doesn’t always see the breathtaking beauty in her own form and function that she finds so easily outside of the mirror. She sometimes can’t manage to believe in herself the way she so effortlessly believes in others, and her kindness and compassion occasionally run out before she gets a piece of it to keep.
Reminding her to pay herself first is a pittance in return for all the joy and adventure she’s brought to my life. She encourages the silly, whimsical part of me that all too often sits in the outfield watching butterflies instead of actually chasing them. As as co-conspirator, she’s everything I could have ever asked for, from concept to execution.
She’s cared for me in my darkest days, fiercely and tenderly, and that is her place in so many lives- the person who comes in to your soul, sets a fire and puts on a pot of something hot and good until you remember yourself again. I wish she was better at letting people do that for her.
I’m allowed, and I thank the universe every day and night for that honor.
November 26, 2011 3 Comments